Three by Charley Chase: "Are Brunettes Safe?," "Forgotten Sweeties," and "Bigger and Better Blondes" (Hal Ruach Studios, Pathé, 1927)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

Last night (Sunday, May 3) the “Silent Sunday Showcase” on Turner Classic Movies consisted of three short films by comedian Charley Chase. His real name was Charley Parrott and the movies – Are Brunettes Safe?, Forgotten Sweeties, and Bigger and Better Blondes – were all made in 1927 by Hal Roach Studios for distribution by Pathé just before Roach switched his distribution contract to MGM. They were also all directed by Chase’s brother, James Parrott (later on Charley would start directing his own films and would take his directorial credit as “Charley Parrott” and his acting credit as “Charley Chase,” much the way later singer-songwriters like McKinley Morganfield, Chester Alan Arthur Burnett, and Declan Patrick Aloysius MacManus did: you know them better as Muddy Waters, Howlin’ Wolf, and Elvis Costello, respectively) and written by H. M. “Beanie” Walker, one of the few title writers in the silent era who successfully converted to writing screenplays for talkies. Chase is often considered the father of situation comedy, though an even earlier star, John Bunny, probably deserves the honor: like such later sitcom stars as Lucille Ball and Gracie Allen, he worked with his real-life spouse and was employed by Vitagraph, and since Mr. and Mrs. Bunny were both rather heavy-set the two couldn’t have done the kind of knockabout slapstick specialized by Mack Sennett’s Keystone crew. So they did a more sedate, genteel sort of movie humor that Vitagraph sold audiences as a kinder, gentler alternative. The three Chase films were shown in descending order of visual quality; the first, Are Brunettes Safe?, contained a closing credit thanking archives in Germany and Austria for supplying prints and for the most part the Boris Faquality was excellent, probably quite close to what 1927 audiences saw. Alas, the other two were considerably blurrier.

Are Brunettes Safe? Is an engaging little farce about “Helping Hand” (Charley Chase), an advice columnist at a big-city newspaper who receives a letter from a small-town woman asking for his help in finding her long-lost son. She enclosed a photo of him, and damned if he doesn’t look just like Charley Chase. On the advice of his editor, who thinks there’s a great human-interest story in it, Chase goes to the small town and impersonates the brother, not realizing that the brother is in fact Bud Gordon, notorious bank robber and criminal. There’s a tearful reunion between mother and (supposed) son in which she tells him all the crimes he’s accused of in the hopes that he can prove his innocence. He meets Bud Gordon’s sister (Lorraine Eason) and falls for her, only there’s the little problem that he’s supposed to be her brother even though he really isn’t. Ultimately it all turns out well as the real brother comes back to town and is duly arrested, while Chase and Bud’s sister get together after all once it’s established that Chase isn’t her brother. Forgotten Sweeties is a more off-the-wall comedy about two young couples, Thurston and Lillian (Charley Chase and the marvelous Anita Garvin, who played comic bitches brilliantly for Roach but never got the feature-film break she deserved) and Ira and his wife (Mitchell Lewis and Shirley Palmer), who literally can’t get away from each other. Lillian sees her husband getting cruised by the other woman and demands that they move somewhere else – only every place they try to move, first to a rental house and then to an apartment building, the other couple follows and rents either the same house (courtesy of an intrepid realtor who seems to think the place is vacant even though it isn’t) or another unit in the same apartment building.

Bigger and Better Blondes – a truly misnomered movie since there are no blondes of any size in the film – casts Chase as an employee of a jewelry store that has just been robbed. The jeweler who owned the store had luckily kept the VanDeusen jewels at his home, preparing to clean them, and he assigns Chase to return them. But Chase runs into Ramona VanDeusen (the young Jean Arthur, who’d become a blonde later in her career but was still dark-haired here) at a restaurant and cruises her. In order to impress her he puts on one of her rings, but she recognizes it as hers and thinks Chase is one of the jewel thieves. Chase loses the ring in a pot of soup and grabs the pot, serving himself the whole supply of soup in an effort to find the ring, but he has to reckon with another customer (Sammy Brooks) who just happened to get the serving containing the ring. There’s some nice slapstick as Chase tries to get the ring away from Brooks before he swallows it, thinking it’s just part of the soup. The diner is also inhabited by the real thieves, Boris Fantomas (Mario Carillo) – the name comes from a then-popular French serial about a master thief who’s a good/bad guy like Raffles and The Saint – and his sidekick (Edgar Dearing). Ultimately it ends the way it’s supposed to, with the crooks being arrested, the VanDeusens getting their jewels back, and Charley getting Ramona. Charley Chase was not exactly one of the greats of silent comedy (and judging from the films of his I’ve seen I’d say he got better when sound came in), but these films were charming and welcome diversions.

The Wedding in Monaco (Loew’s, Compagnie Française de Films, Citel Monaco, MGM, 1956)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

After the three Charley Chase films on “Silent Sunday Showcase” Sunday, May 4 Turner Classic Movies showed an engaging if somewhat disappointing half-hour short called The Wedding in Monaco from 1956. It’s not hard to guess just what wedding in Monaco they were referring to: the real-life marriage of actress Grace Kelly to His Serene Highness, Prince Rainier Louis Henri Maxence Bertrand Grimaldi of Monaco. The two met when Kelly was filming her third and last movie with Alfred Hitchcock directing, To Catch a Thief (1955), and ironically the last film Grace Kelly made before she retired from acting to become the Princess of Monaco was The Swan (1956), in which she played a young woman who renounced her worldly ambitions to marry into royalty. (It was a remake of a silent film featuring actress Frances Howard, who after it was finished quit acting to marry producer Sam Goldwyn.) The film was directed and written by a Frenchman named Jean Masson, and was originally in French with Masson narrating himself. For the American release by MGM, Masson’s French narration was replaced with one by José Ferrer (whose voice I’m ashamed to say I didn’t recognize) in English. The narration claimed that Monaco was the tiniest sovereign state in Europe (which I rather doubt: what about Liechtenstein? Andorra? San Marino?). My husband Charles was amused that the film contained three languages: English, French, and Latin. Masson did quite a few aerial shots, including one of Kelly’s ship, the U.S.S. Constitution, arriving in the harbor of Monte Carlo and delivering her directly to Prince Rainier’s yacht. He was also startled to see Aristotle Onassis in the wedding party looking like the couple’s usher (Onassis was then heavily invested in Monaco, though later he and Rainier had a bitter falling-out and Onassis angrily pulled his investments).

The film showcased the two wedding ceremonies of Rainier and Kelly: a civil ceremony which we didn’t get to hear (all we heard was Ferrer describing it as it was going on) and a religious one which we did. There were also some intriguing credits, including ballet companies from both Paris and London, and the London one was supposed to be dancing to music by, of all people, Stan Kenton. That piqued my curiosity, and indeed the Kenton music turned out to be a ballet that mixed in modern dance steps and was performed to an elaborate re-arrangement of Kenton’s Ravel-derived theme song, “Artistry in Rhythm.” (Before there was progressive rock, there was progressive jazz – a term Stan Kenton actually coined – and like the later prog-rockers, the prog-jazzers were denounced as pretentious and provoked a back-to-basics reaction: “hard bop” or “soul jazz” in the jazz community, especially its Black members since most of the prog-jazzers had been white; and punk in the case of prog-rock.) Other than the big dance sequences, The Wedding in Monaco did tend to drag, and the print TCM had was not in the best condition, but it was an interesting curio even though one senses the desperation from the “suits” at MGM: “Quick! Let’s get one more movie out of Grace Kelly before she retires to be with this guy.” Grace Kelly actually considered an acting comeback in 1963, when Alfred Hitchcock offered her the title role in Marnie. But some busybody in Monaco read the book, realized that their princess would be playing a kleptomaniac, and started a referendum asking the citizens of Monaco if they thought it was appropriate that the wife of their hereditary ruler make a film playing such a vile and disgusting character. The people overwhelmingly voted against her, and she obediently gave the role up and spent the rest of her life, until a car crash ended her life in 1982, playing the role of a princess and mostly waving at crowds from the balcony of hers and Rainier’s palace.

Sister Boniface Mysteries: "How to Murder a Tune" (Britbox, BBC, PBS, aired May 8, 2024)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

Last night (Saturday, May 2) I watched the KPBS showings of episodes of two consecutive British crime series, Sister Boniface Mysteries and Father Brown. Father Brown began as a series of detective stories involving a Roman Catholic priest written by G. K. Chesterton from 1910 to 1936 (when Chesterton died), and apparently the character was based on a real-life priest, Right Rev. Monsignor John O’Connor of Bradford, West Yorkshire, England, who was instrumental in converting Chesterton from the Church of England to Roman Catholicism. Sister Boniface Mysteries was in turn an offshoot of the long-running Father Brown TV series in which the title character was not only a nun but one with a greater understanding of forensic medicine than anyone else in England (or at least in her fictional central England community, “Great Slaughter”), including anyone connected with official law enforcement. Sister Boniface Mysteries is set in the 1960’s and this particular episode, originally aired on May 8, 2024, was called “How to Murder a Tune.” Written by Lisa McMullin and directed by Diana Patrick, it was built around a fictional TV series called Glory Be that was about contests for various church choir soloists. The winner would get a scholarship and national exposure for a potential singing career in either sacred or secular music. The contest was originally thought up by Barry Gold (Jason Pennybrooke), an African-British man, but eventually Donald Merriweather (Michael Spicer) aced Gold out of control of the contest. Merriweather is portrayed as so much of an asshole with a lot of people enraged at his no-holds-barred efforts to get what he wants, including a long-term sexual relationship with Marion Kane (Victoria Broom), for whom he’s rigged the contest so she will win, that it’s not at all surprising that he was the murder victim. He collapses at the organ keyboard of the convent while rehearsing the show, and it turns out he was killed by cyanide but, since he neither ate nor drank anything prior to his sudden death, it’s a mystery how the poison was administered to him. Needless to say, Sister Boniface (Lorna Watson) figures it out.

The cyanide was from the sheet music he was playing from, each page had been soaked in a solution containing it, and whenever Merriweather moistened his fingers to turn a page in the score, the residue collected on them and transferred itself to his body when he licked his fingers to turn the pages again. (It’s not that different from the death of the legendary real-life French organist and composer Louis Vierne, who was the regular organist at Notre-Dame Cathedral in Paris until June 2, 1937, when at the end of his 1,750th recital on the great organ he was scheduled to play two improvisations on submitted themes; he opened the envelope containing one of them, selected the registrations he would use, and then had a heart attack and died while his hands and feet still rested on the organ, producing a low note E from his foot on the pedal. But at least Vierne was not deliberately poisoned.) The killer turns out to be [spoiler alert!] Oliver Potts (Tristan Whincup), whose mother was a lover of Donald Merriweather when they were both attending the same music college, until she decided to leave him. Merriweather’s revenge was to frame her for allegedly cheating on the school-wide exams by stealing the answers in advance. In reality, he stole the answers himself and planted them on her, but this ruined her reputation, she never recovered from it, and ultimately committed suicide over her ongoing shame. We also get a hint, though writer McMullin keeps it from becoming more than a hint, that Donald Merriweather is the young man’s father. There’s a moment of pathos as the official police arrest Oliver, whose boy-band rock-star good looks are impressive in and of themselves, and tell him that by killing Merriweather he’s ruined his own life – and he solemnly tells them that it’s worth it because at least Merriweather’s death means he can’t ruin anybody else’s lives. There are also a couple of amusing subplots, including Marion’s decision after the contest (which she wins because Oliver’s arrest has eliminated her principal competitor) to devote herself to God and sing only sacred music from now on; and the rehearsals for the nuns’ choir, which go terribly until they decide to let their hair down, rehearse at a local pub, and sing “Knees Up, Mother Brown” and other similarly ribald material. The gag is they sound terrible when singing hymns but great at the profane (in both senses) songs. I also liked the way the show kept shifting from color to black-and-white and back, reflecting whether the scenes were real or part of the Glory Be telecast, after I remembered that in the 1960’s British TV had not yet adopted color.

Father Brown: "The Jackdaw's Revenge" (BBC Productions, Britbox, PBS, aired January 2, 2018)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

Later last night (Saturday, May 2) I watched a Father Brown episode from 2018 (I was a bit surprised they reached that far back in the archives) called “The Jackdaw’s Revenge.” It opens in a singularly stark set of a noose and a woman being led to it. She is Katherine Corvin (Kate O’Flynn), and she’s about to be hanged for the murder of her husband. (The show is set in the 1950’s, well before Britain abolished capital punishment.) At first she seems to have come to grips with her fate and meekly accepted it, but it turns out she has a trick up her sleeve. A terminally ill woman who used to work for her as a maid has made a deathbed confession to the murder, and so Katherine is released and officially exonerated. Then she moves back to Father Brown’s home town and shows up at the local Roman Catholic church, declaring her intent to take the vows and become a nun. It turns out that the whole thing is part of an elaborate revenge scheme Katherine has hatched to get back at Father Brown for having established her guilt for murdering her husband in the first place. She has an unlikely ally: Robin Gladwell (Paul Cauley), the publisher of the local newspaper, who was her lover way back when and the reason she wanted to knock off her husband. At first Father Brown suspects her accomplice is the young woman reporter for the paper who’s trying to reopen the case from a point of view sympathetic to Katherine, but in the end Katherine entraps Father Brown by kidnapping one of his parishioners and threatening to kill her. She presents Father Brown with a Hobson’s choice: either kill the assailant and thereby commit a mortal sin, or not act and therefore have the death of an innocent person on his conscience. Along the way she reveals how she got the old maid to confess on her behalf: she hired a thug to visit her and bribe her to do so, saying that if she issued the false confession her children and grandchildren would be well taken care of after her death, while if she refused the thug would kill the grandchildren. Ultimately one of Father Brown’s associates grabs the gun from his hand and kills the assailant himself, and the police show up and arrest Katherine. It was an O.K. episode – the titular jackdaw is a bird actually released in the church as Father Brown is preaching, and it’s an emblem of Katherine – though a bit on the twee side.

Drunken Angel, a.k.a. Yoidore tenshi (Toho Studios, 1948)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

My husband Charles came home from work relatively early last night (Saturday, May 2) and we jointly watched a quite impressive film on Turner Classic Movies’ “Noir Alley” TV series: Drunken Angel (originally Yoidore tenshi), a 1948 Japanese movie directed and co-written (with Keinosuke Uekusa) by the young Akira Kurosawa and co-starring two of Kurosawa’s all-time favorite actors, Takashi Shimura (in their fifth film together) and Toshiro Mifune (in his first of 16 Kurosawa films). It was shot during the U.S. occupation of Japan after World War II, and deals with the collective case of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) the entire nation of Japan seems to have experienced after having lost the war. Specifically it’s about an alcoholic doctor, Sanada (Shimura), and Matsunaga (Mifune), a yakuza gangster who comes to Sanada to have a bullet removed from his hand. It also turns out he needs to be treated for a disease which turns out to be tuberculosis. “Noir Alley” host Eddie Muller explained during his intro that the yakuza were a phenomenon in Japan that started right after World War II. The Japanese government during the war had built up the culture of the samurai and used it to motivate their young men to perform similar feats of bravery during the war, including training to be kamikaze pilots and give their lives in suicide missions against American ships. After the war a lot of young men who’d survived took up crime and organized gangs that operated according to the principles of bushido, the honor code of the samurai – or at least what they thought bushido was. If this is historically accurate, it wouldn’t have been the first time in history a criminal gang started as the result of a war. The Mafia originally began as a resistance movement to Napoleon’s occupation of Italy in the 1810’s – the word “Mafia” is an Italian acronym for “Anti-French Society” – which turned to crime after Napoleon’s defeat. And Jesse James and his brother Frank started out as Confederate guerrillas under the command of William Quantrill in 1862 and turned to crime once the Confederates lost the Civil War.

The main conflict of this quite remarkable movie is between Sanada and Matsunaga, and between Sanada’s efforts to get him to give up alcohol, sex, and the other accoutrements of his gangster life and take his disease seriously, and Matsunaga’s own conflicts between following Sanada’s advice and avoiding the loss of “face” he fears will befall him if his former associates see him drawing back from drinking and screwing. Also, Sanada has a live-in nurse named Miyo (Chieko Nakakita) – it’s not clear whether they’re romantically involved, but probably not – whose abusive former boyfriend Okada (Reizaburô Yamamoto), is just about to be released from a two-year prison sentence. In a bit of coincidence-mongering Kurosawa and Uekusa should have been ashamed of (it’s the one flaw in an otherwise impeccably constructed film), Okada is also Matsunaga’s former boss in the yakuza, and when he gets out he’s determined both to regain control of his old gang and to force Miyo to come back to him. On several occasions Miyo seriously weighs whether to go back to Okada despite his history of abusing her, and Sanada keeps trying to talk her out of it. On a night out with the gang, Matsunaga at first refuses the offer of a drink because he’s at least briefly trying to stay on Sanada’s program and recover from the TB, but Okada goads him into drinking and Matsunaga ultimately ends up drunk and much the worse for wear. Much of the action centers around a wild nightclub and dance hall called “Number One Cabaret” (the signs are in Roman letters) where the yakuza are “regulars” and one of the entertainers is a singer (Shikuzo Kazagi) who in the late 1940’s and early 1950’s had a brief run of success on the Japanese charts with songs that all had the word “boogie” in the title even though, judging from the example here (“Jungle Boogie,” with music by Ryôichi Hattori and lyrics by Kurosawa himself), they had more to do with rhythm-and-blues than what we Americans think of as boogie-woogie. (One of the quirkier results of the American occupation of Japan was that a lot of young Japanese got exposed to American popular music; there’d been something of a jazz scene in Japan before World War II but the Japanese government banned it during the war as an expression of enemy culture. After the war Japanese musicians took up American pop but put an Asian “spin” on it.)

There are also some fascinating supporting characters, including Dr. Takahama (Eitarô Shindô), a classmate of Sanada’s from medical school who avoided alcoholism and went on to a lucrative, successful career while Sanada got mired in the dregs, only when Matsunaga showed up at Dr. Takahama’s clinic, Takahama X-rayed him, diagnosed him with TB, and sent him to Sanada for treatment because Sanada knew more about that particular disease than he did. And there’s a dirty sump of water that becomes a character in itself; it was apparently a set built for another Toho Studios movie but Kurosawa appropriated it and turned it into a metaphor for the waste and destruction left behind when Japan lost the war. Early on in the movie Dr. Sanada sees a group of young boys about to bathe in the water, and he scares them out of it by telling them they’ll get typhus. And there’s a fascinating fight to the finish at the end between Matsunaga and Okada in which Matsunaga tries to kill Okada but is too weak to do so. They have this fight while covered in spilled white paint, and I wondered if Kurosawa covered them in white as a symbol of their lost innocence. After Matsunaga’s death Sanada encounters a 17-year-old schoolgirl (Yoshiko Kuga) who had earlier been counterpointed to Matsunaga as an example of a responsible TB patient who followed her doctor’s orders and took her treatments seriously. He also runs into Gin (Noriko Sengoku), Matsunaga’s former girlfriend, who took charge of his body and had him cremated. She recalls that she tried to get Matsunaga to move with her out of Tokyo and to her family’s farm in the countryside, where he could have got away from the yakuza and their pressures and recovered in relative peace.

Drunken Angel is a quite remarkable movie, and though I’ve considered myself a movie maven I must say I’m far back of scratch on Kurosawa. When Eddie Muller mentioned that Kurosawa’s acknowledged masterpiece, The Seven Samurai (1954), was the first non-English-language film he ever saw at age 12, I felt ashamed that I’ve never seen it at all. I’ve quite liked the Kurosawa films I have seen, including such modern-dress movies as Scandal (1950) and the awesome High and Low (1963), but I haven’t pursued him the way I have with other directors, and it’s possible one reason is I don’t much like the sound of the Japanese language. It’s harsh, guttural, and considerably less pleasant to the ears (these Western monolingual-English ears, anyway) than Chinese. Also, one oddity is that Kurosawa got stereotyped from the international success of The Seven Samurai as “the samurai director,” when at least half of his films take place in the Japan of his own time. But Drunken Angel – Kurosawa’s eighth film as director and the first one that he felt expressed his personal vision instead of being merely an assignment for hire from Toho – emerges as a masterpiece and a worthy entry into the film noir canon.

Law and Order: "Accidentally Like a Martyr" (Dick Wolf Entertainment, Universal Television, NBC-TV, aired April 30, 2026)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

Last night (Thursday, April 30) I watched the two remaining shows in the Law and Order franchise: an episode of the flagship Law and Order called “Accidentally Like a Martyr” (after a song by Warren Zevon off his third album, and second for a major label, Excitable Boy) and a Law and Order: Special Victims Unit show called “Old Friends.” The Law and Order “Accidentally Like a Martyr” show begins with the 30th birthday party of Angela Cole (Annette Berning), in which her father Evan Cole (Eric Stoltz) cuts in on her husband Lucas Peters (Kyle Harris) and demands the first dance of the night with her (to Al Green’s “Let’s Stay Together” – I’ve often been fascinated by the difference between the two major versions of this song: Green’s is an ode to a smoothly functioning relationship while Tina Turner’s is a desperate plea from someone whose partner is about to dump her). Of course we instantly know that someone in that group is not going to make it out of the evening alive, and it turns out the victim is Angela. Dad is briefly a red herring since he never liked Angela’s husband anyway, and he also seemed to be coming on to her in an almost incestuous way. But he’s innocent and the real killer, at least we’re led to believe, is Alan Ross (Jack Mckinney – that’s how the name is spelled on imdb.com), a nerdy hanger-on who has a closet full of 30 photos of Angela, mostly framed (which itself puts him one tick above the usual little nerd stalker we see on shows like this, who just stick the pictures of their unrequited crush object on the walls and don’t bother to frame them). Ross actually confesses to the cops, but the judge in the case, Roberta Hines (Angela Desal), rules the confession inadmissible because the police in general, and Lt. Jessica Brady (Maura Tierney) in particular, essentially tricked Ross into making the confession by saying, when he called for a lawyer, “You’ll really need a magician to make evidence disappear.”

Ross’s attorney has another suspect in mind, rock star Cash White (Zach McGowan), who two years earlier was living with Angela in a relationship and beat her up so badly she required stitches and he got arrested for assault. The morning of Angela’s party Cash came to the venue where it was supposed to be held and asked her to do lunch with him. When she refused, he got so outraged he literally put his fist through a glass window and got it inches away from her face. The prosecutors, Nolan Price (Hugh Dancy) and Odelya Halevi (Stephanie Maroun), discover that Cash’s assault on Angela took place at the end of a long evening in which they were both doing cocaine, and it was because Angela was using drugs that night that she didn’t report the assault to the police. But Price refuses to introduce this information to the jury on the understandable ground that he doesn’t want to traduce Angela’s memory, especially since she’s dead and therefore in no position to defend herself. As a result the jury hangs, there’s a mistrial, district attorney Nicholas Baxter (Tony Goldwyn) royally chews out Price and tells him in no uncertain terms that the purpose of their office is not to see that justice is done in the abstract but to win cases, and the closing shot is of Nolan Price getting a phone call from Angela’s widower Lucas, which he refuses to answer. It was a well-done Law and Order episode and a worthy entry in this series’s canon, though I can’t help but wonder if there’ll be a sequel several months down the road that finally resolves the case one way or the other. Incidentally I looked up the lyrics to Warren Zevon’s song “Accidentally Like a Martyr” online at https://genius.com/Warren-zevon-accidentally-like-a-martyr-lyrics, and it’s a bitter song from the point of view of a lover who’s pissed off at a breakup. If it applies to anybody in the dramatis personae of this episode, it’s Cash White!

Law and Order: Special Victims Unit: "Old Friends" (Dick Wolf Entertainment, Universal Television, NBC-TV, aired April 30, 2026)

by Mark Gabrish Conlan • Copyright © 2026 by Mark Gabrish Conlan • All rights reserved

Afterwards on Thursday, April 30 I watched a Law and Order: Special Victims Unit show called “Old Friends,” about one of the series’s recurring themes: the ability of the rich, powerful, and well-connected to avoid accountability. (Given how the U.S. is currently being run, and by whom, it’s a theme that’s all too timely.) Though the imdb.com page on this episode is woefully inadequate and some of the most powerful actors on the show are, alas, uncredited on it, it’s a gripping tale about a 16-year-old woman named Emma who’s thrown out of a Mercedes-Benz minivan in front of a hospital, where she’s treated for both external and internal injuries. She was at a wild party with plenty of underage drinking and screwing going on, and at one point she and her quasi-boyfriend Matt ended up in the guest bedroom having a sexual encounter, though neither of them remembered the details when they finally came to. Both Emma and Matt had residue of a date-rape drug in their systems, but neither of them were drug users and so they had no idea how the substance had got there. It turns out the party was actually hosted by the mother of one of the guests, who let teenagers come over to her place and do their drinking there on the ground that it’s better they do it in a controlled environment than outdoors in some alley. It also turns out that the mother’s real motivation was to watch her daughter and her daughter’s friends have at it sexually on a video camera hidden in a lamp inside That Room, so she could get her own kinky thrills from it. Unfortunately, the mother is also the daughter of a well-respected retired judge who had been a mentor to just about every sitting judge in New York City. He not surprisingly pulls every string he can to ensure that mom doesn’t have to suffer the indignity of a criminal conviction, including assigning the case to Judge Lance Ryan, an old friend of his who stacks the case against the prosecution big-time. The case turns on Emma’s testimony, only Emma has a dark secret of her own: when she was a child she was regularly sexually molested by a rich uncle. Emma told her mother what was going on, and her mom responded by making sure she and the uncle were never alone together again, but she refused to report the crime to the police because the uncle bought her silence by agreeing to pay for Emma’s dad’s cancer treatments.

Emma tells all this to Captain Olivia Benson (series star Mariska Hargitay) but swears her to secrecy, and Benson keeps that vow even during an intense trial session in which Judge Ryan demands that she answer the question, she refuses, and ultimately Judge Ryan orders her held in contempt of court and arrested and handcuffed on the spot. Fortunately for the case, this shocks Emma into releasing Benson from her vow of secrecy and testifying fully for the prosecution, and the Kinky Mom is ultimately convicted. But there are two intriguing subplots to this episode, both involving a Black woman who’s been appointed Chief of Detectives for the entire New York Police Department. For some reason she’s convinced that Benson is a dirty cop and is determined to destroy her career, and to that end she’s installed a young protégé of hers on the Manhattan Special Victims Unit to get the goods on Benson so the Black woman chief of detectives can fire her, or worse. The young male detective to whom she gave this assignment joined the police force in the first place to exonerate his father, who was previously forced out for an allegedly “bad” shooting of an unarmed suspect – only the suspect was actually armed and the young man finds the gun in the evidence room in the police archives. At the end of the episode, just as Kinky Mom has been convicted in spite of Judge Ryan’s best efforts to rig the case in her favor, and the SVU detectives are in the office celebrating, the Black woman chief of detectives, whose animus towards Benson is left powerfully unexplained by writer Justine Ferrara (and though it might have been explained in an earlier episode, I can’t recall any such thing and I watch this show regularly enough I think I would have noticed), suddenly strikes back. She announces that because Benson was held in contempt of court and arrested, she’s suspending Benson indefinitely and demanding that she surrender her badge and gun. I doubt if this is going to last long, because after “Old Friends” ended NBC showed a trailer for next week’s episode and Benson was back on the job as usual, but it still seemed like an outrageous plot twist and a decidedly unfair one given that we’ve seen no indication that Benson ever acted inappropriately on this case or any other.